I think before this pregnancy is over ...

my OB is going to think I'm absolutely insane. Yesterday I called because I had some pain and cramping in my left side, right near my kidney area. My mom has a history of kidney stones and I was so nervous that something was wrong.

The hubs was in the hospital already because he was getting his IV medication so I figured while I was there I would call them. They told me to come and pee for them so they could send it out. When I did, I left the sample on the shelf and when I came out, they told me I was good to go, so I left the office, thinking that they'd send it out and if something was wrong, they'd give me a call after it was sent out. Where we were in the hospital, there was no cell reception, so after I left the OB's office, I didn't check my phone for messages til about 3 (about 4 hours after I had initially gone up to see them.) There were FIVE voice mails on my phone from the OB's office, asking where I had gone, and that I needed to be seen. Wha?

I called them back and they told me that I had needed to be seen, and I had left the office before I could be. In my world, if someone says I'm, "good to go" that generally means I can ... well ... go. When I got back up to the OB's office, they asked where I had gone, so I told them, and they all got a big kick out of it. They saw me, and I could hear the midwife outside my door talking to the nurse and she said, "But we just sent her urine out."

She came in to see me, told me that my RLP is kicking in, that the stretching hormone (whatever that's called...) is also kicking in. AND that I've gained somewhere around SEVEN pounds... in a WEEK! Some of it is 100% water weight - my feet/ankles/hands/fingers are ridiculously swollen, and the OB wants me to keep my feet up as much as possible to keep the circulation up.

Really, they're probably going to think I'm crazy if I confuse RLP with kidney pain.

Tickled Pink to say we're having

a boy!

Liam Charles is looking good, and measuring a little bigger than average - normally about 7 ounces right now and he's 11 ounces. Child better stop growing so much!! The OB called me today and needs me to go have a level 2 ultrasound done to get better pictures done because he was moving around so much yesterday that the tech wasn't able to get the best photos. They said that they def need pictures of the heart, and that made me a little nervous, but they did say that everything that was fine, so I shouldn't worry too much.

Snow and dreams

There's a snow storm today! Ugh ... I'm much more of a summer person than a winter person.
Snow removal is part of our apartment stuff included - in the parking lot, at least. Except, I didn't realize it was only Mon-Fri when the people were here. There's at least 5 inches of snow in the parking lot right now, I can't get out to do anything, and its going to continue to snow, with a break for icy rain, over the next 8 hours. I have to go to work tomorrow morning (the husband has to go to work tonight, but he has a truck and grew up in Alaska) and I don't know how I'm going to get out! Since snow removal is included, we don't have a shovel! I have to run a workshop tomorrow after I teach, and then my Jr High Youth Group is going bowling. I wish I could just call out tomorrow, but it's not a good idea, not with the workshop I have to run.

...Did I mention I never got winter boots for this year?...

In other, happier, thoughts, when the husband came home today I told him that one day I wanted him and his uncle to build a house for us. (The husband used to work in construction and his uncle owns a construction business.) I know we'd still have to pay his uncle, but we'd cut a lot of costs since we'd be going through family. And I'd much rather buy the land and then build what I wanted, rather than buy something someone else invented. So, now I'm going to start finding pictures and things of what I'd want in/for my house. I really hope that he realizes I'm serious because, really ... I AM. So stay tuned for some pictures of what I want my house to be!

FDC class is FINISHED!

I started a class through my job in July, 2011. Today, I took the test and if I pass, I pass the class. To be honest, if I didn't pass, I probably don't deserve to work at McDonalds. It's one of those tests that because I sat through that class for 7 mths, and I have the experience it was easy. If someone off the street took it, I could understand them not passing. But I have NO excuse. So heres hoping that it really was that easy, and that I'm not completely screwed!

We're going to Chili's as a celebration (we meet in 1/2 hour! I need to get going!) and then tonight I'm going to see Stephen Lynch with my brother and sister. I'm thankful that the weather has decided to start overnight, but I hate that the husband has to work the night shift and I worry about him. Tonight it will start after he's already there, so I'll worry about him on the way home. Tomorrow we were going to see Red Tails but with the weather - we're not. I have to put together my workshop for work on Sunday, which shouldn't take too long, but I've been putting it off (shame on me) and then the Jr High Youth Group is going bowling Sunday afternoon. I'M not bowling, but I'm going to watch them - I haven't bowled since the husband and I started dating. I used to be on a bowling league, but I don't want to make a fool out of myself in front of my students!

The Sr High Youth Group is going on a retreat the 2nd weekend of Feb and I WANT to go, but its $76 ... and I just don't have the money right now to do that. I feel bad, and I'm thinking about asking the place if I can do a payment plan.

Off to lunch!

Fears are normal, but don't let them take over.

I've been thinking about how much life is going to change once the fraggle makes their appearance (still only 1 baby in there - but still don't know boy/girl.) Our lives are going to change, for the better, but nonetheless, they will change. I fear some of the changes sometimes and how I will react to them, or how I will handle them. I worry sometimes that what I have been trained to teach other people I may not be able to execute myself. Why should I be worried about that? There is no logical reason for it.

I get worried that I STILL won't have a job. Having been laid off in October due to the agency closing, I am still job-less. I feel more and more like a loser as the days go on because I don't feel productive. With the husband working nights, there's only so much cleaning I can do in our little apartment. Vacuuming is out, obviously, and even doing the dishes can get loud. And lets face it, cleaning is boring sometimes! The only time I like to clean is when I can blast some music and I can't do that when he's sleeping. I admire those moms that are stay at home and I wish I could do that, but I know right now I am not able to - or SHOULDN'T be able to. I don't want to stress out about it too much, because I literally make myself sick with worry about it. Worried I don't pull my own weight, worried I don't do my fair share....I know that the husband doesn't think that, and he knows the right job will come along soon, and until then, he's just as happy having me home and resting and baking the fraggle as he would be with me out and bringing home some money. It's my own mental breakdown, knowing I spent so much time (and money) on school and I have no job to show for it. My friend told me today that "unemployment doesn't mean unemployable" and it's true - she's 100% right and I need to remind myself of that. The economy is difficult right now and I need to be thankful and grateful that I have those employable skills that others may not have.

I discovered a consignment shop near my house today. I've never been in a consignment shop, but I have a feeling I will be visiting this place quite often. Honestly, when I walked in, it felt kind of magical. Not knowing boy or girl yet I wasn't going to spend money on any clothes or anything like that, but essential things, like a bathtub, was there and at a REALLY decent price. I bought some stuff, Lysol'd them and I am just waiting for the baby to make their appearance so I can use them!

I'm getting anxious to get the nursery done, but I also know that I'm only 18 weeks and still have some time to go. The husband doesn't want to do the registry until we find out the sex of the baby, which is fine - I've started one on Wal*Mart because I couldn't wait anymore! (He knows about it ... but he also knows I want to go to Babies R Us so we can use the gun!) I don't expect anyone to buy us anything - but I want the registry for myself so I can remember what I liked and what I want without having to go through the store or online a million times over. I want to get a crib in there, want to get the glider in there ... I feel like I'll feel like its more complete and more real once those two things are in there. I have the border up there, and I've done some things for the room, but I don't feel like it will be coming together or I'll know where to put some of those things until the big items are in there and I can set up around them. The teacher in me has a dream of having a book corner. I made a HUGE floor pillow (seriously ... huge ... it took an entire 5 lb bag of fiberfill to fill it up!) and I want it in the corner where the books are so that the fraggle and I have another place to sit and somewhere to go and read!

I have "so much time" left, but then I think there isn't that much time left! We're hitting half baked in a week and change --- and the first half FLEW by (of course, I'm sure the holidays had something to do with that) and we have to get through the winter, and with the potential for snow storms, I'm sure it will feel like it's dragging sometimes. I don't want it to be May 25th and I still have a laundry list of things to get done. On the TOP of my list of things to get done is to clean out my car! Seriously, I can't even believe how gross it is. There is just ... STUFF in it. I never took out the box(es) I filled when I cleaned out my office from my job - I somehow thought if I didn't bring it inside, then I would get another office really fast and just transfer it to my new one. My trunk is full .. of I don't know what. Stuff I put in there from when my parents basement flooded in March 2010. Just a LOT that I know I don't need most of anymore, I just haven't gotten around to cleaning it out. I SHOULD have done it when I found out we were expecting, but that would've been too easy! By the time its nice enough for me to want to do it, I'll have a belly reaching from here to Kentucky!